NARCOLEPSY NIGHT SCHOOL

Do you have a friend with narcolepsy? I have two!

No, I am not going to give you one of them. What is your problem?! First of all, your question seems to indicate a very lax attitude towards human trafficking. Second of all, how am I going to mail one to you?

You have to think these things through.

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HOW TO GET INTO EXERCISE (For People Who LOATHE Exercising)

Does the mere thought of exercise make you too tired to exercise? Does the thought of going to a gym inspire you to run away from a gym? Would you rather pull your teeth out with rusty pliers than exercise because screw this, I know where cake is?

Me too!

But I now weigh the same as I did when I was a late teenager and am only getting stronger. I love weightlifting, and this coming from someone who despised the thought of exercising at all.

How?

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Apollyon’s Deal Without The Devil

Here is where I show how deep the nerd vein runs. This is from a campaign in a D&D homebrew module called “Midgard” that a friend of mine is running. Apollyon is a tiefling bard who has shaky morals to begin with and has known for a while that his father is a devil, although he has never met him. Tonight is the first time he met his father, who wants to make a deal with him.

It’s just something I threw together with sparse editing or flavoring to help my GM (game master) understand why my bard character is suddenly a Hexblade Warlock. So reader beware: this is incredibly nerdy and is high fantasy. Results may vary. Don’t operate heavy machinery while reading.

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James Klein – Secret Base Janitor

All I gotta to say is I ain’t got time for anyone’s bullshit, you know? That includes you, your friend here, your one-way mirror over there that’s supposed to make me think it’s just a mirror and I am not being watched. Hello there, assholes!

“Not being watched…” Ha! You jackasses know where I worked, right?

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