Oh, Improptu You!

Word Count

Seriously, why is that really a thing anymore?

Writing Advice: Bullsh*tting!

NanoWriMo is over, daily word counts are done, a wild stab at writing something long has been stabbed, the horses have all flown, the gerunds have done whatever they do, the last rabid dog has been shot, and Atticus has finally shown Scout that he has the capacity for violence.

Now what?

Write more, that’s what! Whether or not you finished NanoWriMo, if you participated, you have something to work on.

But what if that writing is something you dread at the moment? Completely understandable. You’ve written a lot, and despite what your old gym teacher said, writing is work. I can understand if you want that novel to percolate for a while.

But really, keep writing. I keep saying that, partially because it’s important and partially because I can’t remember what I posted a few days ago.

So what do you write if you don’t want to work on your novel/novella and the thought of starting a new one makes you feel exhausted and numb, like when someone tries to explain Algebra to me?

Writing Prompts!

They are the “quickie” of the writing world. For those younger readers, a “quickie” is a very short glass of chocolate milk with marshmallows. For readers over the age of 18, that is not quite what a “quickie” is.

Anyway, writing prompts. They are short little situations that allow you write a paragraph or two. The important thing is they are writing exercises, developing a talent to write an impromptu piece. They can be mini-stories, apologetics, screeds, exhortations, self-hypnosis, or insane ramblings.

NOTE: If you are insane, I suggest you slide the tin foil hat to the side to give you a jaunty look. Winter needs jaunty. Fashion is worth the few stray coded sentences the lizard people beam into your head. Suffer for beauty!

Sorry. Writing Prompts. The shiny tin foil distracted me. Let me give you a few prompts. They’re easy to create and share. Usually it’s just a situation that you fill in the blanks; kind of like an essay test about Mad Libs.

Remember Mad Libs? It was how I successfully learned what an adverb was. See? I just used one. Puckishly.

I still have no idea what a gerund is. Since I doubt I am going to suddenly find myself fighting to the death in “Grammar Club”*, I am not in a terrific hurry to look it up.


Sorry. Here we go:

  1. You wake up to discover that your left foot has swollen to the length of your forearm. Who did this to you, and is there a law against that?
  2. You finally confront your nemesis on the ledge of a cliff by a waterfall. Describe your sense of déjà vu.
  3. You meet Lucifer in a bar. When you call him Satan, he testily explains that “Satan” was his maiden name. What is going on?
  4. You are to address the 257th annual meeting of the “Run-D.M.C. Appreciation Society.” What is your speech, and how could this possibly have been going on for 257 years?
  5. You have spent the better portion of your vast fortune and have worked tirelessly for years, but you have finally acquired complete control of every citizen of Bugtussle, Oklahoma. Why?
  6. You are a superhero. What are your powers and how do you plan to abuse them?

That should start you off. Share writing prompts with your writer friends, or just randomly accost someone on the bus with them. The future is in your hands!

*The first rule of Grammar Club is don’t talk about Grammar Club. The first task of Grammar Club is to determine what is grammatically wrong with the first sentence.