NARCOLEPSY NIGHT SCHOOL

Do you have a friend with narcolepsy? I have two!

No, I am not going to give you one of them. What is your problem?! First of all, your question seems to indicate a very lax attitude towards human trafficking. Second of all, how am I going to mail one to you?

You have to think these things through.

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HOW TO GET INTO EXERCISE (For People Who LOATHE Exercising)

Does the mere thought of exercise make you too tired to exercise? Does the thought of going to a gym inspire you to run away from a gym? Would you rather pull your teeth out with rusty pliers than exercise because screw this, I know where cake is?

Me too!

But I now weigh the same as I did when I was a late teenager and am only getting stronger. I love weightlifting, and this coming from someone who despised the thought of exercising at all.

How?

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James Klein – Secret Base Janitor

All I gotta to say is I ain’t got time for anyone’s bullshit, you know? That includes you, your friend here, your one-way mirror over there that’s supposed to make me think it’s just a mirror and I am not being watched. Hello there, assholes!

“Not being watched…” Ha! You jackasses know where I worked, right?

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World Building, or A Collection Of Headaches

The great thing about being a writer is we know enough about a subject for laypeople to think we are know-it-alls and just little enough for experts to think we are idiots.

Take space exploration. Please.

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